Wait A Minute This is Too Deep

Waita

 

I n t r o d u c i n g

 

                                The only tool you will ever need to maneuver through relationships especially the one with yourself….
My Advice Column.

Galadriel Talk


Message your questions via facebook or tweet them to @galadrieltalk, I am here to help cupcake. Seriously, if I had a more than an Associates Degree in Theater I would totes go back to school right this very second and become a therapist. I am passionate about helping people, help themselves; whether that be dressing better, laughing more, getting along with your mother or losing weight. I love love love love love this shit yo!

 

My first round comes from questions that were sent in for the straight boy and straight girl episodes of my talk show IN BED WITH GALADRIEL. www.youtube.com/galadrieltalk I simply cannot wait to receive the next round of questions, don’t be shy and don’t ya worry booboo baby, mama will never ever ever reveal your identity.

 

 

 

Dear Giladriel,

 

I heard you are really good at analyzing dreams from a coworker of mine.
I dreamt my ex had purchased a very cool but sparse vacation home but in the dream was complaining she couldn’t afford an eye exam despite that she really needed glasses. Also in the dream I was packing to leave her vacation home (we weren’t a couple in the dream) and I was packing all these shoes..ones I no longer have in real life and a bunch of new Christian Louboutins and I think I was headed to Europe….what the hell does this dream mean, it’s one of those I can’t stop thinking about and normally I forget my dreams once I wake up.

 

-I liek your show btw,
NightWalkin in Boston

 

 

Dear NightWalker
I do indeed have the gift of dream analysis; every morning as child my mother would gather us at the breakfast table in our rural kitchen with the wood stove burning and have us tell her what we dreamt the nite before. She would then show us how to interpret the dream and even taught us how to do things like stop the dream or turn to an assailant and say, you are not real; this is a dream. Anyhooshal, NightWalker, back to you, enough about me.
NightWalker, your ex’s vacation home represents the subconscious….what we can say is, her subconscious is on vacation and a bit sparse. Perhaps your ex is not all that deep or perhaps, just at this time in her life, she seems to be disconnected from her journey, hence being on vacation. Don’t envy her NightWaker, she sounds like a betch. The eyeglass/eye exam imagery represents that your ex is not willing or able emotionally to see clearly what is around her whereas you do…this was shown as you had an eye exam and she couldn’t afford one despite being able to afford a vacation home, hello something doesn’t add up here. I am happy you were packing your shoes and leaving her vacation home, NightWalker, as this represents you are fully ready and able and are choosing to leave your ex’s way of living and your ex in general and headed for all new territory aka  forgien lands. I love that you are taking both old shoes and super cunt new ones cuz this says you are leaving this relationship with what you learned (the shoes you used to walk in) and you have all new mad skillz (the Louboutins).
Congrats NightWalker you are ready for greener pastures and big things, hopefully this will include learning to spell peoples names, it’s Galadriel.

 

Love Ya, Mean it,
Galadriel

 

 

 

 

Dear Galadriel-
What’s a good way to flirt with men on a vacation in a foreign country. ie A lady wants to be safe but still have some fun.
-Anonymous 30 something Woman

 

 

Dear Anon
Being in a foreign country is a fantabulous time to step out of your flirt comfort zone and really go for broke. If you see a person you find attractive I suggest direct eye contact with sex laced eyes and a cheshire cat grin. This winning combo look reveals to your flitree exactly what your intentions are. Repeat three times, if the flirtee does not come over to you time to flirt with someone else. I trust once the flirtee arrives in your hungrey hands you know what to do with him/her/shim next.

 

Trust Me I’m a Doctor,
Galadriel

 

 


Dear Galadriel-
I am about to turn 36 translation: there is a gun being held to my biological time clock and I know I want to have a baby. My boyfriend, who I love deeply and have a wonderful relationship with just revealed he doesn’t think he wants to get married or have children. I am devastated and freaking out, I want to spend my life with this man but our goals are so different, do I leave him?
-Signed I want to be Wife and Mother.

 

 

Dear Mrs. Mom
What an incredibly heart wrenching situation to find yourself in. There is no quick solution or easy advice for me to give. In your question you have shown me your life map and your boyfriends life map, which is essential for every individual. My concern is where is your shared map. Sounds like the two of you need to have a heart to heart about what the “we” looks like. I believe you need to be clear with yourself about what the deal breakers are in this relationship and the only person who needs to know your deal breakers other than you, is him.
In addition I want to challenge you by asking you a few soul digging questions.
1. If you and this man broke up tomorrow and over the next few years as you get closer and closer to french kissing 40 you dated several wonderful guys but none who were right to settle down with; would you go ahead and have a baby on your own?
2. If your current boyfriend and you did indeed marry and have a child and your life ended when the child was six how do would you feel about his ability both emotionally and financially to raise the child alone.
To close once your deal breaker is stated to yourself and to your boyfriend it is time to put it on a shelf and not let it stink up the room. State your dealbreaker and state the amount of time you are willing to give him to respond…I believe three months is gracious and realistic.

 

I wish you strength and passion Mrs. Mom thank you for writing in,
Galadriel

 

 

Dear Galadriel-
I had sex with this girl with who I’m not interested in pursuing anything. She on the other hand wants more, but I know that we’re just not right for each other. Since we’ve messed around,  am I obligated to date her? If so how long do I have to wait before I break up with her?
Signed, The Gemini Lover

 


Dear Gemini Lover,

Short answer: the sooner the better. Just call her up and say would you hate me, if I wanted you and I to just be buddies? Most girls will say, I could never hate you. AND most will ask why, so be prepared to tell her you love her personality and think she is the
bomb.com and cute but you would be a lot happier if you two were good friends. Release this girl so she can have her time back to go hang with a new guy/friends/pets/family/herself etc. Side note: she may go through a period of a very bruised ego which will include ignoring you and/or shit talking about you. The sweeter you are the less that ego will get bruised. Bonus addition: what was most interesting to me about your question was not the content but the usage of the word obligation. I learned a lot about you from that word and what you have been taught about happiness. So here is the real advice Gemini Lover: I give you a 30 day challenge to not use the word obligation in your head or out loud. I would like you to replace obligation with CHOICE OR CHOOSE.

Love, Galadriel

 

 

 

photo and graffiti done in Los Angeles, California by one of my fave artists ever, PRVTDNCR.

 

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